One day you’ll find yourself dining out with a large group. Expect that some will underpay, and that it’ll be your wallet and not the waiter’s tip that covers the shortfall. If this feels unacceptable, don’t attend—group dinners are mostly miserable anyway.
One day you’ll find yourself being shown nude photos of a friend’s girlfriend. Don’t look, but do reconsider the friendship.
One day you’ll find yourself greeting somebody while sitting at a table. Do your best to push your chair from the table and fully stand. Few things are more awkward or emasculating than shaking hands from a half-squat.
One day you’ll find yourself entering college. College is great, but don’t forget to leave—higher education should prepare you for the world, not become it.
One day you’ll find yourself pointing. Don’t. And especially not at women in bars.
One day you’ll find yourself dealing with a bathroom attendant. Tip well and tip often, but don’t tip him. A man standing between you and the paper towels is performing a shakedown, not a service.
One day you’ll find yourself doing laundry. Driers waste electricity while slowly fading, weakening, and otherwise destroying your clothes. Save both the environment and your wardrobe by hang-drying.
One day you’ll find yourself having fun. Enjoy your fun, but be sure it’s not at the expense of somebody else’s.
One day you’ll find yourself fucking up at work. It happens, so give an honest accounting of the mistake and then make sure it doesn’t happen again.
One day you’ll find yourself traveling. And one day you’ll find yourself taking a vacation. There’s a difference, and you should allow time for both.
One day you’ll find yourself confused by manners. Just remember the object of manners is only to put others at ease and you’ll be okay.
One day you’ll find yourself assembling a wardrobe. When doing so, don’t confuse fashion with style. A man should find a style that works for him and turn it into a uniform. Think Picasso’s nautical tees or Malcom X’s skinny ties. Leave fashion to women.
One day you’ll find yourself exploring a new city. By all means, use a guidebook, but reserve at least one afternoon for getting lost.
One day you’ll find yourself sitting alone at a bar. Wait until you’ve ordered your first drink before pulling out your smart phone. This small courtesy to your bartender allows conversation, and conversation sometimes leads to free drinks.
One day you’ll find yourself looking for your first real job. It may seem unfair, but your first job after college immediately becomes more relevant to your career than how you did in school or what you studied. Plan accordingly.
